Am I Doing It Right?
The Art of Seduction. Do you ever wonder “Am I doing it right?” Or weather or not your smooth moves are working? Not sure if your advances, touches, or scents are appreciated?
Maybe we all need to better understand what it really means to seduce someone in order to know if we’re actually doing it right.
Merriam Webster’s dictionary defines seduction as:
Something that attracts or charms.
Easy enough when you break it down into small pieces, right?!?
So, how do you seduce someone from across the room, who you know nothing about?
How do you attract and charm a stranger? How do you get the attention of someone you’re interested in, and keep it?
You’re not going to like this answer, but it’s a truthful one.
You, do YOU!
That’s how.
You Do You.
You become seductive when you take care of yourself because you’ll literally glow from the inside out. The confidence and self-esteem meter will be higher than it was before you started, that’s for damn sure. When you start to care about yourself it shows, and others take notice too.
1) Be Appealing.
Present yourself in a manner where you’re dressing to impress even when the venue doesn’t call for it. You’ll stand out, as to let it be known you’re confident in yourself.
For instance, instead of wearing jeans and a t-shirt to a neighborhood BBQ, wear Capri pants, a flow-y top or a comfortable casual dress, one with pockets, is always nice. Men, a nice pair of casual dockers will go a long way coupled with a button down, collared shirt, or a polo can be nice too.
Make sure to smell clean. You don’t have to wear all the snazzy smelling colognes and perfumes. You just have to not stink.
A clean smelling person, one who smells like they care, will go further than not.
2)Be Healthy.
A healthy person is one of sound mind, body, and spirit. Well, theoretically anyway. Work on getting plenty of rest for a clear mind, adequate exercise for a healthy body and increased energy, and meditation for your spirit.
Are you getting at least six hours of sleep a night? If not, figure out a way! We need at least that to function properly and even more to flourish and make good and sound decisions. So get your rest!
What about exercise? If you’re not exercising your body at least three days a week (at minimum) you’re doing it wrong. Seriously! Get out there and get AT LEAST 20 minutes of increased cardio a week, and for the older community, like me (gulp) add those weights! Our muscles need the weight training and body resistance so do more of that for added energy too.
Meditation can be many different things to many different people. So, if you’re picturing sitting Indian style on a floor mat with your hands in your lap and your eyes closed, good! That’s one way to do it.
Another way could be to sit in a park listening to the birds and wind wrestle the trees.
And yet another way could be to sit quietly and pray.
Most importantly, listen to your inner self in those quiet moments. Those are the moments we wait for and the feelings we need to listen to. If you need help in getting there, this book on guided meditation, may help.
Photo by madison lavern on Unsplash
3) Be Smart.
Learn about new stuff which interests you. Pick something you like and investigate it. I myself, have an interest in the violin. So, a few weeks ago I went and rented one from the local violin shop, to see if it’s something I may continuing learning.
You know what I learned?
I learned that learning a new instrument takes a LOT of fucking time. I mean A LOT!
You can learn a little more about me here.
I learned I love the violin, but I want to learn to play something with my husband so that we can connect on yet, one more level. We’re shooting for the keyboard next!
Learn about yourself by testing your own limits. Maybe those limits have changed in the last 5, 10, 15 years. Something you may have said no to before, you may be up for today. Time has a way of teaching us wisdom, allowing limiting beliefs to fall to the wayside, which opens opportunities for new and cool shit to happen.
Go learn something new today!
4) JUST BE.
To me, The Art of Seduction has more to do with who WE are and how WE feel, then it does with how we can charm or attract someone. Sure that comes into play, BUT, if you can’t get these other things down (or at least a few of them), you’ll struggle with this form of art.
Here’s a great article on how you can get started today.
Working on yourself is always empowering. It offers a boost of self-esteem and confidence all in itself.
And, what exactly does a confident person look like?
They look attractive!
Make it a habit to be appealing, to be healthy, and to be smart. Become your own Art of Seduction and the rest will happen all on its own and in its own good timing.
Most importantly, as Andy Frasco would sing, “Don’t think too much, it just complicates things.“ Instead, JUST BE.
Until next time, be well, and kind to one another.